Mr. Cinical had been attempting (for the last 10 minutes) to “set a cockroach free” (in his words). This involved him trying to flip the scurrying cockroach with a piece of paper so that it landed on its back.
Irritated at his futile attempts (and disturbance of my usual sleep patterns), I grabbed some tissues, caught the cockroach by surprise and threw it out of the house.
Mr Cinical: “You could be charged for causing grievous hurt to the cockroach. Or even murder if you had intended to kill it.”
Me: “I just don’t want the cockroach in the house.”
Mr. Cinical: “You should defend yourself by saying that the cockroach was committing criminal trespass. You have the right of defense of private property. My criminal law exam is next week, so I’m studying.”